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Wednesday Wisdom
April 12, 2017 in Musings, The T's House | Tags: humor, laughter, life, sayings, Sivana, zen | Leave a comment
So, here is something that I found over at Sivana and it’s pretty good Zen Wednesday wisdom, and good for a few laughs, especially after the last few weeks. #6, #12 and #18 are favorites of mine. What are yours?
21 Sarcastic Zen Sayings You Need In Your Life
By Matt Caron
- Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.
- Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
- Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.
- The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.
- Some days you’re the bug; some days you’re the windshield.
- If you ever feel you are worthless remember that you are full of expensive organs.
- It’s always darkest before dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.
- Don’t be irreplaceable. If you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted.
- Always remember that you’re unique, just like everyone else…
- Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
- Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
- If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
- No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.
- Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
- If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
- The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
- A closed mouth gathers no foot.
- Duct tape is like ‘The Force’. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
- Generally speaking, you aren’t learning much when your lips are moving.
- Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
- If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.