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Today is my sister’s birthday. She is four years younger than I am and has been a part of my life for as far back as I can remember. She is my first and probably my dearest friend. While we might not have always seen eye to eye, particularly when she saw fit to carry the entire contents of my half of our room from the attic room that we shared to the basement of our two family home, effectively relocating me while I was not home, (I’ve let that go as you can see) as we have grown we have shared many wonderful memories that warm my heart. When we did share a room, there were our all night Monopoly games (with the board located on a table between our beds) and a double date here and there. Since we’ve had husbands and children of our own, I know she is always the one that I can commiserate with or cry to or complain to and she will always be there to listen.
As we raise our boys Tom and I have tried very hard to instill in them the idea that they will always have each other. They should always look out and take care of one another since we will one day no longer be around. I think often of how nice it is to hang out with my sister and how comfortable that relationship is. I hope that my boys enjoy the same relationship with their brothers as I do with my sister and my brother. It’s nice to know the comfort of having someone around that knows where you’re coming from because they were there too and know you as well as you know yourself.
Happy Birthday Donna! Love you!
Memorial Day is the traditional “start” of the summer season. Often celebrated by BBQs, picnics and trips to the beach if you live close enough to a beach. The town pool was definitely enjoying its opening weekend. When we moved to Vermont, Memorial Day didn’t have the same “start” of summer feel to it. Perhaps it was because things weren’t as warm here at the end of May. The pools don’t open, but the parks do.
This weekend, as I type this it is 41 degrees — hardly summer type weather. The forecast is calling for a high of 48 tomorrow, again not summer weather and then snow tomorrow night. Yes, you read that correctly, SNOW. The forecast for the higher elevations (where we are located) has vacillated between 2 inches, 5 inches and now it’s one inch. In any event, snow just don’t scream “summer”. For those who like skiing or snowboarding however, it might be excellent news, since Killington is still open for such activities.
I’ll keep you posted. 
It was very foggy this morning on the hill. Most of it is gone by now…one of the perks of being up on the early side. The landscape recreates itself as the sun rises.
Tonight, Tim had the honor of presenting a program for the Wallingford Historical Society on navigating Ancestry.com. He did a great job researching his own family tree in order to be able to explain to the audience at Town Hall the tips and tricks of researching your own genealogy. Yet another reason to be proud of my sons!
Last night were inductions for the National Honor Society at the high school. I am very proud to say that my oldest son was among those that were inducted – yet another stop on the road of mom tears of pride in the final weeks of his senior year. While others on the stage may have reveled in the honor, for TJ it was particularly sweet moment, one that was a long time coming. That moment on that stage represented a lot of hard work on his behalf, a lot of learning how to advocate for himself and a lot of anxiety and stress.
Webster’s dictionary defines “tenacity” as the quality or state of being tenacious. “Tenacious” is defined as persistent in maintaining, adhering to, or seeking something valued or desired. TJ exhibited those qualities many times over in his pursuit of membership in the NHS. You see, last year, he was invited to apply but declined membership despite the fact that almost all of his close friends and classmates were admitted. On appeal, he was told by the selection committee that he would have to work harder and demonstrate the qualities of character, leadership, scholarship and community service that were required for membership and if his grades were acceptable, he would be invited to apply again the following year. While I personally respectfully disagreed with the committee’s decision to deny his appeal last year, he took their words to heart and did something that I am proud to say, I don’t think I personally would have done. He got down in the trenches and worked along side his friends who were members of the NHS and attended and participated in almost every NHS activity that the chapter held. He got up early on a weekend morning to bake pies for food baskets, moved turkeys for the same food baskets, helped make the food baskets and spend a whole day driving around Rutland County to deliver them. He participated in their other fundraisers as well and did his best to prove that he was worthy to be considered among their ranks. This year, when the selection letters were sent, he received his letter. He applied once again for admission and once again, he was denied admission. He was devastated. He was simply told that he did not have a “majority” of the committee’s vote. Undaunted and once again showing character far better than his mother and beyond his years, he wrote the following letter to the committee respectfully asking them to reconsider his application.
To whom it may concern,
Being aware that I have not been accepted into the National Honor Society this year, I, Thomas Heffernan, write this letter in hopes of presenting my case. Being denied acceptance the previous year, I have re-applied after a year of working hard to prove myself as deserving of admittance. I have worked fervently with the current NHS members and advisor to attend as many functions as possible, working around my part time job and numerous AP classes, in order to help the organization, as was asked of me when I was not accepted last year. The letter I received after being rejected suggested that I prove myself as deserving of acceptance, through furthering myself in the categories examined by the committee including: leadership, service, and character. Working around my job and academics I have managed to, in my opinion, strengthen myself in these areas. In the area of service I continued membership in our school’s Key Club organization, as I have since sophomore year, totalling over 15 hours of community service attributed to this group. In addition to this I attended numerous National Honor Society functions such as apple pie baking, the NHS fundraiser dance, food basket preparations and food basket delivery, and carnation assembly and delivery. I did this in an attempt to demonstrate my leadership, as I prompted other members who were not admitted to help at many functions, I provided my own free time in order to service the NHS, and I also feel that my working so closely with the National Honor Society after being rejected admission speaks highly of my character; specifically taking into account that I have spoken with many of the current senior members who have told me that they would not have the same level of respect towards the organization I hold had they not been admitted. Despite my rejection from the NHS last year I was able to get admissions to amazing schools such as Rochester Institute of Technology, Villanova, Northeastern University, Boston University, University of Vermont, and others; thus at this point my admission to the NHS holds no title for me to put on a college resumé, but would allow me one pleasure I would greatly appreciate which would be to walk with many of my close friends at graduation as a member of the same organization. I have worked extremely hard this year to put anything I may have done to offend the committee, or those who scored me, in my past, as I hope many are able to see, and to further myself as a person and be a paragon of the values of honesty, trustworthiness, character, and integrity I hold dear. Taking the advice I received from both Madame Sullivan and the committee to heart I put my best foot forward and gave myself up to display my worth to the National Honor Society and I truly hope that it allows me to be granted admission during my final year at Mill River High School. I appreciate that you have taken the time to re-review my application and give me a second chance to demonstrate what I have learned over the past year, I eagerly await your response.
Sincerely,
Thomas J Heffernan
Tom and I have tried very hard to teach our boys to advocate for themselves and to respectfully push forward for what they believe they have earned and when they perceive they are not being treated fairly. Having a mother who is an attorney they understand that they will not always win, but they always must try. There are two sides to every story and sometimes the story someone is presented with is not an accurate portrayal of the true facts. I am very proud to say that when I read this letter, it brought tears to my eyes and I told my son that no matter the decision of the faceless committee that would decide his fate, to me and his father and to those who do truly know him, we are very proud and feel as if any rejection was the association’s loss. To give you an idea of what was going on at the time, this letter was written while he was in the midst of studying for four Advanced Placement exams. He met with the NHS advisor to review the reasons for being rejected and took that information to heart while writing this letter.
So, you see, while others on the stage last night were proud and happy as well they should be of this accomplishment in their high school career, for our son it was a hard fought battle where he learned more than the attributes of scholarship, leadership, service and character. He learned what it’s like to succeed and demonstrate that you are worthy against adversity. He has learned more than many of his fellow classmates because of this experience. The lessons learned and the experience will follow him throughout the years to come.
Congratulations TJ – we are so very, very proud of this accomplishment because we know how hard you worked for it and how much it truly means to you.
Related articles
- NHS induction helps students become better people (sailorslog2013.wordpress.com)
- National Honor Society Inducts Juniors (dhsprincipal.wordpress.com)
- Our Own Chapter: A Look Inside GEHS’ National Honors Society (babysimpsonblog.wordpress.com)
It is so hard to believe that TJ will be graduating in a few weeks, making prom even more tear jerking. I warned him that this would be the first of many tear filled events for his mother over the coming weeks.
To make a special day even better, it was a historic event in the Heffernan house. It marks the first and last time that all three boys attended the same prom. Here is Tyler and his date
And last, but not least, Tim with prom date.
Well, maybe a little more than a chill. The day after I packed away all the winter turtlenecks and heavy sweaters, the temperatures dipped into the low 30s and there were snow flurries flying around on the hill this morning. The temperatures last night dipped down low enough to have frost and freeze warnings. Hard to believe that when we were at church on Sunday for the May crowing that it was a beautiful spring day and we saw our first finches at the feeders.
Tim was invited to participate in a celebration honoring the parish members who received confirmation and communion. After mass the kids participated in the May crowning.
The crowning was a little less than traditional, since Mary was already wearing a crown of sorts — a robin had nested at the top of the statute. So the flower crown was carefully placed in her hands instead.
It was cold enough all day here to warrant the wood stove being cranked back up again. Amazing to think that in mid-May we are still keeping warm by the fire — with hot cocoa no less.
We had a great time listening to some beautiful music today at the All State Music Festival. It was a great performance.
Congratulations to all those students that were selected to participate.
As we prepare to head up to Winooski to listen to Tim perform with his classmates in the All State Chorus, on this beautiful spring Friday afternoon, I thought I would share some of the photos from Bistro.
It has been a wonderful, musical year and I’m very, very proud of my vocalist. In the words of his brother — he has the voice of an angel.
The entire group of performers taking a photo opportunity during rehearsal on Thursday afternoon.
One very proud mama posing with her son……
My (not so) little (anymore) men…….
There have been way too many days since we had rain. Things were very dry as evidenced by the numerous fire hazard warnings.
Yesterday and last night we received some much needed rain. Too bad it cancelled the All State parade that everyone was looking forward to seeing.
This morning however, the flowers all stood with their rain drops showing.
Beautiful.
A friend’s friend posted this on Facebook. I simultaneously was laughing and crying because it’s exactly what I would say and what moms want. I had to share.
Thanks, Mary Carpenter for the great words!
So I’ve decided to be proactive and tell my kids what I want for mother’s day. Here it is:
What I Want for Mother’s Day
Dear Children,
Mother’s Day is coming up, and I thought I should tell you what I want. This way there’s no guilty panic or last minute purchasing of flowers at the closest gas station. So, this is what I want, this year and every year after; it’s pretty simple really.
I want you to be a decent human being.
I want you to be who you are, but don’t be an asshole.
I want you to work hard at everything you do, because life is too short not to give it everything you’ve got.
I want you to ask for help when you need it.
I want you to help others when they need it.
I want you to learn how to cook, do your own laundry, pay your bills and know how to clean a bathroom.
When you screw up, and you will, more than once, I want you to own it, because it’s the screw-ups that make the victories sweeter.
I want you to travel, because the world is huge and you are one part of it.
I want you to know that even when we hate each other, I will never stop loving you.
I want you to play nicely with others.
I want you to feed your curiosity.
I want you to find a way to do what you love, and realize that that might look different than you originally thought.
I want you to respect every human being’s right to be who they are.
I want you to sometimes be more interested in someone else than in yourself.
I want you to know that you are flawed and you are extraordinary. There is no one else like you.
I want you to know that I would lay down my life for you in Lily Potter fashion any day of the week.
I want you to realize how lucky you are every once in awhile even if only for an instant.
I want you to know love, even if it means getting hurt.
I want you to relax and not feel guilty about it.
I want you to know life can be brutally hard sometimes.
I want you to know that you can choose happiness even when the dark side offers you cookies.
And I wouldn’t mind breakfast in bed.
See, simple.
Love,
Mom
When you’re in school, it is referred to as “spring fever” or “senioritis”. The feeling that things are winding down and should be over already. The itchiness that comes along with the sunshine and warm temperatures. The desire for the laziness and freedom of summer and all that comes along with it. It has been a hectic school year for all of us here with lots and lots of things going on — one son completing senior year and his college search, one driving and working through the difficult junior year course load and the youngest busy with music and coming into his own high school career as a sophomore.
Soon, very soon in fact, will be course selections for next year for the younger two who will be a junior and a senior next year. Right around the corner is the prom for all three boys –the first and last time that will happen (with all the preparation that goes along with tuxedo rentals and corsage flowers), the various awards nights at school coming up on the schedule for music, theater, academics and seniors. That will all be followed closely by college orientation, exams and graduation in June.
I am torn between wishing that time would slow to a crawl and preserve those precious moments left before one leaves for college and my anticipation of all those wonderful events coming up in the next few weeks to celebrate lots of good things.
Things are squared away nicely with TJ having made his college choice and knowing that he is happy and looking forward to the start of a whole new chapter in his life. Tim will be spending a good chunk of the summer abroad experiencing places that I have never been to in my life. Tyler will be working and starting his college application process with lots of essay writing mixed into his summer. Adventures will abound this summer.
The coming weeks will be filled with lots of fun, laughter, pride and tears of happiness. Looking forward to every minute of it.
